Honest journey of healing.

A random thought one day lead to the daunting realization

That it is soon going to be year since that fateful day

A word vomit spewed on a mail that put an end to it all

Its been a constant struggle since that day

An unresolved battle between feeling nothing and everything all at once

Anytime a wayward memory tries to cross the stringent barrier of my brain

I tend to not remember the intricate details but somehow never forget the pain

Anytime the chaos I ensue around me quietens down

The memories rush back with feral intensity trying to remind me of the forgotten times I try so hard to overlook

Once the cycle begins, it all then tends to go downhill

The questions and thoughts escape, suppressed and suffocated

The light in my heart and soul forsake me

The day I chose to draw the curtains on my intuition

As the clouds of morose mortality take over

In the darkness where existing is the only thing close to living

In my naive mind I thought that enough time has passed now

To feel that maybe I’ve healed from the scars of my past

But the reality is that even today after all this time

The moment any memory of that time passes my mind

I’ve to shut my eyes close and take a breath inside

Until I regain consciousness with my surrounding

Away from the demons that possess my mind

As I scramble to conceal them in broad daylight

All I can hear now as everything around me fades into a blatant blur

The loud silence of my mind still grappling with the answers I was afraid to ask although deep down knew the answers were hard to swallow through

And now despite it all, those same questions haunt my existence until all I feel

Is the violent void of my vaults as I try to make peace with my thoughts.

2 Comments Add yours

    1. Thank you for reading and appreciating the composition! 😄

      Liked by 1 person

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